For the Man Who Has Everything

For the would-be Green Lantern on your Christmas list, we suggest this Power Ring complete with Battery.

Sadly, it's only a replica, but still...

Christmas Tip

Get your Christmas shopping done early this year by ordering that special someone the Tercenturian Hamper from Fortnum & Masons. It's a snip at only £20,000 and includes these stocking stuffers:

• Cup of Excellence Coffee Gift
• 3x 250g caddies; Ladies’ Travel Set includes Jewellery Roll, Slippers, Mask and Cushion
• 25 Person Foie Gras en Croûte, 1.09kg
• Balsamic Treasure Trove, 2x 250ml bottle, 3x 50ml bottles
• Two pairs of Cashmere Socks in pink and grey
• Side of Smoked Scottish Wild Salmon, min. wt. 1.6kg
• Beluga Caviar, 200g tin
• William Yeoward Caviar Glass Dish
• Château d’Yquem, 1er Grand Cru Sauternes 1996 5 ltr Jeroboam
• Le Montrachet Grand Cru, J Prieur 1995
• Leather Cigar Holder
• Two William Yeoward Champagne Flutes
• William Yeoward Champagne Jug
• Three-tier Rich Celebration Fruitcake, min. wt. 8kg
• Château Latour, 1er Grand Cru Classe Pauillac 1970
• Gentleman’s Leather Jewellery Box
• Silver-plated Elephant Place Settings
• Two Cashmere Scarves in pink and brown
• Silk Box filled with a Selection of Chocolates, 2kg box
• Beaufort Cheese, min. wt. 2kg
• Cropwell Bishop Whole Baby Stilton, min. wt. 2.2kg
• Highgrove Ham, min. wt. 5.7kg
• Krug Champagne, Vintage Collection 1981, Magnum

• Tercentenary Champagne Truffles, 250g drum
• Vintage Port, Fonseca 1955
• Herend Tea Set for Two
• Tercentenary Ceramic Tea Caddy containing White Tea, 40g
• Château Margaux, 1er Grand Cru Classe Margaux 1983
• St James Christmas Pudding, 1.81kg ceramic basin
• Griottes, 227g wooden box
• Fortnum’s Favourites, 2.8kg box
• Wood and Steel Cigar Cutter
• Baron de Lustrac, Armagnac 1900
• Hand-engraved Stationery
• Wine Notes Book in Leather
• Entertaining Book
• “The First Three Hundred Years”, Fortnum & Mason Book
• Chunk Comb Honey, 14lb jar
• The Paragon Crackers, box of six
• William Yeoward Glass Honey Pot
• Lime Curd, 908g jar
• Lemon Curd, 908g jar
• Fortnum & Mason Apron, Oven Glove, Tea Cosie and Tea Towel
• Two leather Luggage Tags in red and black

Presented in a three-tiered English willow hamper set

Beats a cheese wheel, box of Ferrero Rocher and a case of milk stout, I suppose.

Christmas Unveiled

The Muslim woman pegged to deliver Channel Four's "alternative" Christmas message in full veil has withdrawn (emphasis added).

In a statement, she said that it was the unexpected publicity around her decision that made her change her mind.

But a source close to the programme makers said one of the reasons was that she had been pressurised by senior members of the community who felt it was not her place to talk about Islam. It has also been said that she had received threatening letters from non-Muslims accusing her of trying to upstage the Queen.

Pass the eggnog, please.

Yuletide Dhimmitude

From Reuters (emphasis added):

A school in traditionally Catholic Spain has cancelled Christmas celebrations so as not to offend children who are not Christians, ABC newspaper reported on Wednesday.

The Hilarion Gimeno school in Zaragoza said teachers had put forward various reasons for not celebrating Christmas, but ABC said the worry was that Muslim children might be upset.

Where is El Cid when you need him?

Happy Whatever

Seatac airport in Seattle is removing its Christmas trees after receiving ONE complaint.

For sale: One backbone. Hardly used.

And a Corn Chicken in a Palm Tree

In an effort to make Christmas more "inclusive", some British schools are going to such "inclusive" lengths as to avoid Christmas celebrations in favour of a "inclusive" "multi-faith" function, dumping the carol "The Twelve Days of Christmas" for a reggae version that replaces partridges with "inclusive" "corn chickens" (whatever the deuce they are) and golden rings with mangoes, and, at Rotherham, removing turkey from the menu to make way for an "inclusive" "Muslim Christmas" (?!?) Halal dinner that is more "integrated".

Modern Britain, where "inclusive" is defined as that which excludes traditional Christians.

Sign of the Times

From the BBC:

A veiled Muslim woman will deliver this year's alternative Christmas speech on Channel 4, the broadcaster has said.

Why is it that the words "snapshot of Britain's future" keep popping into my head?

Update: Also on the BBC, three quarters of British firms have banned Christmas decorations to avoid offending Muslims "staff from other faiths".

Maybe "future" was the wrong word.