Project M

Nasa's plan to send telepresence robots to the Moon.

To hell with using your robotic avatar to touch the ancient dust of a stillborn world before staring up at the ethereal beauty of the Earth hanging in the sky like some fragile gem suspended in the mind of God, I want two of these things so a friend and I can start punching the daylights out of each other.

The Mark 2 should have lasers and shoulder-mounted missile launchers, of course.

Hugo Drax, call your service

Now that the programme is coming to an end, NASA is selling off its fleet of space shuttles at a knock-down price of $28.8 million dollars and throwing in the main engines for free.

Install a death ray in the cargo bay, add a couple of solid rocket boosters, and you'll be making demands for world domination for under $100 million tops.

Mission Accomplished

Nasa has announced that their LCROSS probe has destroyed the secret Dalek base impacted on the Moon.

A Nasa spokesman was quoted as saying "Oh, what a give away!"

Moon bomb

Nasa to bomb Moon on Friday.

Moon threatens retaliation.

Update: Well, at least they aren't using nukes this time.

New suit

NASA shows off its new spacesuit. It's promoted as an all-rounder, but the question remains whether there will be a tweed cut for country outings.

And those trouser cuffs look a bit suspect, too.

ISS RIP

According to Popular Science, Nasa is planning to deorbit the International Space Station in 2016. This is some service life for a station that hasn't even been completed yet.

I didn't know Chrysler was the main contractor.

Space Turkey

It's good to see that NASA is keeping up with its hallowed traditions.

No shrimp cocktail, though.

Taste Test

This is an example of the sort of writing assignment that I am thankful I never get.

Space Loo

The bog on the International Space Station has clogged again and Nasa is buying a second from Russia, who built the last one, that will cost $19 million when installed.

If anyone at the Johnson Space Centre is reading this, I can give them a new toilet for £120 and install it for free if they'll provide transport and the tea.

Can't say fairer than that.

Nuclear moon

Nasa is considering a nuclear reactor to power its proposed Moonbase.

Nice design, but since it only generates 40 kilowatts it won't be much use powering laser defence batteries, so i don't imagine that Shado will be very interested.

Red Planet Rumours

There are rumours that a White House briefing indicates that a major announcement is going to be made about life on mars.

I don't see what more needs to be said. While the original BBC series was pretty good, it's pretty obvious that the American version on ABC will be a dry disappointment.

Space Pee

Nasa is asking its employees for urine samples. Eight gallons of them.

The reason for this is that the Orion... EIGHT GALLONS?!?

Galaxy Map

For the really, really lost.

Space Kharzi

The toilet aboard the International Space Station is in imminent danger of breaking down.

Man the escape pods.

Update: It's a Russian toilet.

We'd like a word with the procurement officer, please.

Mars Phoenix

Nasa JPL Phoenix Mars Lander HD Animation
by Darkflame

Nasa's Mars Phoenix Lander is due to touch down on the red planet at 5:00 PM PDT in the first fully-automatic soft-landing attempt since the disastrous Polar Lander mission in 1999.

Whether the crew at JPL still has any fingernails left by then is open to debate.

Update: Phoenix is down and working.

However, no word from Captain Black yet.

Space Boomerang

Astronauts aboard the International Space Station demonstrate that a boomerang can fly in zero gravity.

Good to see Nasa isn't wasting its budget on frivolities.

Space Cabbage

NASA is adding kimchi to the International Space Station's menu.

They've been wanting to test that emergency escape plan for years.

Wally Schirra 1923 - 2007

Wally Schirra, one of the original Mercury 7 astronauts and commander of the Apollo 7 mission has died at the age of 84.

Godspeed, Captain.

Headline of the Day

From the Arizona Republic:

NASA gunmen got poor job review

You think?

Spaced

From the International Herald Tribune:

NASA astronaut to run Boston Marathon -- on space station

From the Aero-News Network:

NASA Adds Padded Airlock, Straight Jacket To Shuttle Equipment Complement

Not a moment too soon.

Major Matt Mason

The Mattel toy company's contribution to the Space Race.

I didn't have one of these, but a friend of mine did. Am I bitter? No, of course not. What makes you think that?

Little bastard!

Space Food Sticks

The Space Race produced many wonderful things that have enhanced our lives and broadened our understanding of the universe.

This wasn't one of them.

Putting a Damper on Things

NASA is preparing to send a team of astronauts to an underwater habitat this May. The mission is partially to test new equipment, but mainly to keep an eye on the astronauts in the light of recent events.

Can't be too careful these days. After all, duct tape can only do so much.

In Space, No One Can Hear You Enter a Plea

A female American astronaut has been charged with attempted kidnapping, battery and first-degree attempted murder in a bizarre plot to confront her rival in a romantic triangle that involved a high-speed cross-country car trip from Houston, Texas to Orlando, Florida by said Astronaut, who (I'm not kidding) wore adult nappies so she wouldn't have to stop for potty breaks.

Remember the good old days when a congressional hearing was held because Gus Grissom smuggled a corned beef sandwich aboard Gemini III? No wonder I have this headache.

Moonbase of Moondoggle?

This article by Gregg Easterbrook in Slate is a bit too cynical for my tastes, but it does raise the important question of whether the proposed US moonbase would, like the International Space Station, end up being built merely to justify its own existence.

Lt. Ellis, Call Your Service.

The United States is planning to establish a base on the Moon.

What the purpose of such a base will be or whether it will be manned by babes in purple wigs has yet to be decided.