Priorities

The Royal Navy is facing cuts so severe that its very existence is at stake, but they're thinking of allowing women to serve on what few submarines are left, so there's nothing to worry about.

Black armband day

I remember my Dad taking me to watch this at Earls Court back in the '60s. It probably put me off team sports for life because all the others seemed far too tame.

A Navy's lot is not a happy one

The fight against Jihadist pirates and Jihadists in general has become an absolute joke. Not only are Somali pirates caught red handed and released as a matter of course thanks to insane rules of engagement, but a British couple is kidnapped from their yacht by Jihadist pirates under the very eyes of the Royal Navy, who do absolutely nothing except watch. The head of the Navy, Admiral Sir Mark Stanhope, then, with amazing brass, claims that the ship involved, RFA Wave Rider, could do nothing in the situation.

Perhaps the Admiral should get to sea more often, because Wave Knight not only has a Merlin helicopter, but two 30 mm cannons and four 7.62 mm machine guns as well as 26 Royal Navy seamen to man them. How does this equate as "couldn't" rather than "weren't allowed"? True, it was a hostage situation, but how would that have prevented the captain from getting on the loud hailer and telling the pirates that if the hostages were harmed the pirates would die one second later while putting a shot across their bow to avoid any misunderstandings about trying to leave.

As for letting pirates go, I am actually all in favour of that. let them go by all means. Without their boat and twelve miles off shore. Chumming the water first I leave to the discretion of the captain.

Still, for all it's faults, at least the RN isn't lumbered like the Anericans with a commander in chief who takes credit for a rescue mission while apparently taking petty revenge on the real heroes for upstaging him before he could apologise to the pirates.

I suppose running convoys through the area while the US and Royal Navies sweep the pirates off the seas (Not in a convoy? Prepare to be boarded.) and burn their shore bases to the ground (Women and children to the evacuation units, please. As for the men; healthier if you move inland, son. Now.) is out of the question. Pity.

Sinking the fleet

Demonstrating that it will succeed where Phillip II of Spain, Napoleon, Kaiser Wilhelm, Hitler, Hirohito, and the Argentinian Junta failed, New Labour is reducing one of the two aircraft carriers on order for the Royal Navy to a helicopter carrier and cancelling her JSF fighters.

Meanwhile, the US Navy is ordering more of one type of warship than Britain has for her entire combat fleet.

Pardon me while I open the windows. There's a stench I want to get rid of.

Update: Maybe they'd have the money for the fleet if they'd stop spending it on groups that openly advocates murder and treason.

Bar shot found

A history enthusiast has uncovered a round of bar shot in a garden in Scotland. In light of looming budget cuts, the Royal Navy has asked if they can have it back.

HMS Queen Elizabeth

The BBC has a report on the beginning of work on HMS Queen Elizabeth, the first of Britain's two next generation strike carriers, that includes this curious statement (emphasis added):

The vessels will be capable of carrying up to 40 aircraft and will be used for a wide range of tasks, including supporting peacekeeping operations and conflict prevention.

No, their purpose, and rightly so, is to wage war and strike fear into the hearts of our enemies. Otherwise, I don't see any point in them.

The Bleedin' Obvious

After spending half a century doing to the Royal Navy what the Graf Spee failed to do, the government has noticed that six ships, no matter how advanced, cannot defend Britain.

Next up: water flows down hill.

Admiral Hornblower, Call Your Service

HMS Illustrious is taking part in the flypast to commemorate the 100th anniversary of what would become the Fleet Air Arm. As part of the festivities, the BBC filed a report on life aboard the carrier. Unfortunately, the correspondent, Mr Rajini Vaidyanatha, needs to do his homework or at least avail himself of the services of a decent copy editor. He not only calls Illustrious a "strike carrier"(she is no such thing. Her official designation is a "through-deck cruiser", though she is more commonly referred to as a "light carrier"), but he compounds the embarrassment by claiming she carried 700 "staff". First, the number leaves out 370 Fleet Air Arm personnel and is therefore too low, and I have no idea what "staff" is supposed to be. Presumably he means "officers and men".

If the RN is the wooden wall, then the BBC are the knotholes.

Sub Standard

One of the lucky breaks of my career is that I had the opportunity of visiting any number of United States, Royal Navy, NATO forces and other allied submarines, which meant that I've sampled some of the best food among the best company in the armed services–Not to mention coming across the biggest wok I've ever seen aboard a Japanese boat.

Here's a glimpse of the Royal Navy variety.

Type 45 Troubles

The Royal Navy's Type 45 destroyer; the most advanced warship in the world–at least, it would be, if the MoD bothered to put any bloody missiles on it!

Sub Crash

According to The Daily Mail, the nuclear ballistic submarines HMS Vanguard and Le Triomphant collided in the Atlantic on the night of February 3rd and Vanguard had to be towed back to Faslane.

If Vanguard had gone down, Britain's nuclear deterrent would have been reduced to a farce. As it is, we're going to be in a hell of a spot until Vanguard comes out of dry dock. Now that two bomber boats managed to ram into one another, maybe someone at the Admiralty MOD will wake up and realise that ships do tend to sink from time to time and that's why the Royal Navy needs at least a one-third surplus in every class of the fleet to absorb casualties.

If New Labour feels that this will cost too much, then maybe a few Jihadist clerics can do without their benefit cheques for a few weeks.

Carrier Carried Back

Owing to inevitable defence cuts, the arrival of the Royal Navy's two new carriers has been set back by about two years.

In order to fill the vulnerable gap in Britain's defences, the Foreign Office is sending a polite note to all our enemies to be good sports and hold off attacking until we're ready for them.

Retreat of Empire

HMS Northumberland, the frigate that has been guarding the Falklands, will be replaced by the fleet auxiliary ships RFA Largs Bay instead of another warship because the hopelessly shrunken Royal Navy is too overstretched to meet its commitments.

In saner times, this would be a shot across Whitehall's bows that no one would dare ignore. Either increase defence spending dramatically or Britain is going to face a humiliation that it hasn't seen since Dunkirk.

Update: At least some men of integrity are taking this seriously.

HMAS Apocalypse

Despite the dreadful typo in the headline, it's actually quite a good article.

Ha Harr!

Somali pirates have struck again, seizing a ninth vessel in twelve days and the Royal Navy is leading an international task force to sweep the freebooters from the seas. This return to the sort of barbarism that was thought to have died with the Barbary states has so unnerved the major powers that even Russia is recommending attacks on the pirates' bases along the East African coast.

It's a nice show of reality finally sinking in, but unless the rules of engagement are as serious as the threat of these latter day corsairs and a commitment is shown to not only capture them, but to string them up at Wapping, then this will likely end up as a very expensive exercise in nautical handbagging.

HMS Dragon Launched

Gads, she's beautiful. We need 18 more like her and her sisters at a minimum.

Royal Navy Captures Pirates

What happens when you let the RN do its job.

The Wooden Wall Thins

As a "cost-cutting" exercise, HMS Exeter is being mothballed a year early, leaving the Royal Navy with only 19 fully operational frigates and destroyers.

Far from talking about selling off HMS Victory we may have to put her back on active service.

Logging the Evidence

Manmade global warming? We present Captain James Cook and Vice-Admiral Horatio Lord Nelson with the case against.

Right Purchase, Wrong Budget

Sans Trident

Two Royal Navy warships have been on active duty for nearly seven months without their primary armament aboard in a "cost-cutting measure".

This is the reason why I support the Royal Navy being completely refitted with nuclear-powered ships armed with the latest in laser and particle beam weaponry–so the b******s at the MoD can't can't leave them dead in the water by skimping on fuel and ammunition.

Oiling the Andrew

The Royal Navy is running tests to see how well their ships operate using biodiesel.

A beautiful example of Whitehall logic: The most sophisticated warships in the world and the MOD wants to run them on salad dressing.

Or They're Just Trousering The Money

The Royal Navy is building invisible warships.

At least, that's what they're telling us.

Plymouth Saved

Defence Minister Baroness Ann Taylor has refuted stories that the Royal Navy base at Plymouth is to close in five years.

Good news at last.

Another Nail

Plymouth naval base is to close in five years.

Sir Francis Drake finds new career as rototiller.

The Thinning Wall

The Telegraph looks at the state of the Royal Navy.

It is not good.

Swing & Roundabouts

The Royal Navy doesn't know whether its coming or going. It's forever being praised for doing sterling service, yet never gets anything but budget cuts from the Treasury. On the one hand, the Labour government is threatening it with secret cuts that would reduce its fighting strength by half, and on the other we see BAE systems studying how to provide the Navy with a technological marvel of a warship so advanced that it can command fleets of unmanned combat units and carry out a full-scale invasion practically on its own. At this rate, we'll probably end up with a fleet consisting of a single hull, but it will be a dilly-- provided the MOD bothers to include fuel, maintenance, spare parts, manpower and munitions in its operating budget.

I wish the powers that be would make up their minds about whether Britain is worth protecting or not. Maybe someone should show them the fine print where it specifies that the first and foremost duty of government is defence of the realm and not making sure that the proles don't smoke in the pub.

The Gulf

Apparently the Royal Navy isn't the only service that the Iranians have attacked. In 2004, the mullahacracy tried to capture an Australian boarding party, but that one never made the headlines. Why?

Answer: They fought back and won.

According to the Sydney Morning Herald,

Quoting a "military source", BBC security correspondent Frank Gardner reported Iranian forces made a concerted attempt to seize a boarding party from the Royal Australian Navy and that the Australians "were having none of it".

"The BBC has been told the Australians re-boarded the vessel they had just searched," Gardner reports, "aimed their machine guns at the approaching Iranians, and warned them to back off, using what was said to be 'highly colourful language'.

Our sources inform us that the Royal Navy has requested a shipment of spines from the RAN.

Astute Observations from Beyond

"Fidel Castro," whose "best health care in the world" involves the common folk scrounging for Pepto-Bismol and aspirin on the black market while the party elite and foreign tourists enjoy special clinics, has criticised the British, saying that the price of the new Astute-class submarines would train 75,000 doctors.

Quite right. And if we didn't have the submarines we could employ all those doctors to patch up all the people maimed by the likes of Castro as they run rough-shod over the world.

Don't you have some mouldering to get on with, old boy?

HMS Astute

The state of the art nuclear attack submarine HMS Astute makes her debut to the press.

She's a beautiful boat and if she can do half the things claimed for her, she's a triumph of British engineering, but we need at least twice the number that MOD has ordered at the bare minimum.

Doesn't matter how good the ship is if she can't be in two places at once.

Carriers Okayed

The government has given the go ahead for the construction of two new strike carriers for the Royal Navy.

It's not nearly enough (the Navy needs two carrier groups at the very least) and doesn't in any way excuse the appalling, suicidal cuts New Labour has inflicted on the Senior Service, but we should be grateful for these tiny bursts of sanity.

A Telling Point

Fight to preserve the United Kingdom or just shrug, pack up the Tridents and move south-- guess which one New Labour is opting for.

Tommy's Not the Man His Father Was

The American Spectator looks at political correctness and the state of Her Majesty's armed forces.

It is not encouraging.

Hornblower & the Ice-Cream Navy

William S. Lind over at d-n-i.net weighs in on the Royal Navy debacle:

For Britain, and especially for the Royal Navy and Royal Marines, the incident ended in utter disgrace. The initial surrender of the British boarding party to what appears to have been a much larger Iranian force is the only defensible British action in the whole sorry business. Even in Horatio Hornblower's Royal Navy, a British frigate captain was not disgraced if he struck to a French or Spanish ship of the line. Force majeure remains a valid excuse.

But everything else that was said or done would have given Hornblower or Jack Aubrey an apoplexy. The failure of HMS Cornwall to foresee such an event and be in a position to protect her people; the cowardice—there is no other word for it—of the boarding party (including two officers) once captured; their kissing the Iranian's backsides in return for their release; and perhaps most un-British, their selling their disgraceful stories to the British press for money on their return -- all this departs from Royal Navy traditions in ways that would have appalled the tars who fought at Trafalgar.

Yet that is not the worst of it. The worst of it is the reaction of the Navy's higher-ups. According to a story in the April 7 Washington Times, the Royal Navy's top commander, Admiral Jonathon Band, leapt to the boarding party's defense with virtually Jerry Springeresque words:

He told the British Broadcasting Corp. he believed the crew behaved with "considerable dignity and a lot of courage" during their 13 days in Iranian captivity.

He also said the so-called confessions made by some of them and their broadcast on Iranian state television appear to have been made under "a certain amount of psychological pressure."…

"I would not agree at all that it was not our finest hour. I think our people have reacted extremely well in some very difficult circumstances," he said.

Had the captives been 10-year old girls from Miss Marples' Finishing School, Admiral Band's words might make some sense. But these were supposed to be fighting men from the Royal Navy and Royal Marines! Yes, I meant men. What Politically Correct imbecile detailed a woman to a boarding party?

I've reserved my opinion on who is culpable in this mess on the grounds that it is unfair to judge a man in a tight spot, but after the appalling way that both the former hostages (I almost hesitate to acknowledge them as Royal Navy) and the government has acted in the aftermath, it is clear that this is an episode that the Navy and Her Majesty's Government can only look back upon with shame. I'm willing to give all the benefit of the doubt to someone who falls into the hands of a load of murdering Jihadists and is forced to make propaganda against his will, but there are limits. Compare these images of RAF pilots John Peters & John Nichols that were broadcast on Iraqi television during the first Gulf War:

To this one of the fifteen hostages in Iran:

They didn't even have enough pride (or sense) to leave those blasted "goody bags" behind. Talk about selling your birthright for a mess of pottage! It's one thing to cooperate with the enemy to the absolute minimum under extreme pressure. It is quite another to do so with such enthusiasm after what we now know was so little persuasion-- unless fear of missing a daughter's birthday or being called "Mr. Bean" now counts as duress vile (And no, I have not forgotten the mock executions. On that point I refer back to Private Moyes).

As Mr. Lind points out, far more blame can be placed on the commander of HMS Cornwall, who sent his men into harm's way without adequate protection-- indeed, we now learn no protection at all. No RN officer should be in a position where he can't say this (courtesy of C. S. Forester):

Capt. Horatio Hornblower, R.N: If I am not back aboard the Lydia within one hour, she'll train her guns upon your fort and reduce it to rubble.
El Supremo: With you in it, Captain?
Capt. Horatio Hornblower, R.N: That is my order.

Near enough blame can also be placed with the boarding party officers who did not order their men to give the enemy as little as possible and a great deal more blame can go to Faye Turney and Arthur Batchelor, who sold their stories to the press regardless of whatever Whitehall fathead said that it was okay to do so. At the very least, I hope that a fistful of official reprimands are being shoved into service records.

But the real villian in the piece (aside from the Iranians, but that's irrelevant, as they should have come out of this with nothing but a few shot up patrol boats and a stern warning to never try it again) is the Blair government, who from the first were more worried about spin than giving the armed forces the support they need and deserve and it's going to take a damn sight more than Des Browne falling on his sword to put things right. According to Michael Smith and Maurice Chittenden in the Sunday Times,

The origins of the shambles lie in the navy’s concern over cuts. At the height of its power in the mid-19th century, it could muster more forces than the seven next biggest navies combined.

Now it is the Cinderella of the three services and has been largely sidelined during the operations in Afghanistan and Iraq.

The Royal Marine commandos and the SBS, still both part of the navy, have fought with distinction in both operations, but the main contribution from the navy proper was to fire off a few token cruise missiles on the opening days of each war. Even then the United States snaffled all of the best targets.

During the attack on Afghanistan, said one senior intelligence source, the Royal Navy’s expensive cruise missiles had done “little more than rearrange the rubble” at a couple of disused Al-Qaeda training camps. Her Majesty’s ships have not seen any serious action since the Falklands and are struggling to attract the right calibre of recruits.

Even the royal family now give the “senior service” a miss. It used to be standard practice for royals to serve in the navy, a tradition followed by George V, Edward VII, George VI, Edward VIII, the Prince of Wales and the Duke of Edinburgh. But Princes William and Harry have both preferred the army, although William is scheduled for a short spell in the navy next year.

Fearing further decline, navy chiefs ordered a publicity drive centred around HMS Cornwall, a frigate sent to take over last month as flagship of Task Force 158, the allied flotilla protecting the Iraqi oil installations and territorial waters.

Television crews from Sky and the BBC were flown on board the ship to film the crew at work monitoring the northern Gulf; Cornwall was to be the front-page story in Navy News, the navy’s in-house journal. But from the start the publicity drive went awry.

Cornwall, known as “the ice-cream frigate” because of its designation F99, travelled to the Gulf via Barcelona, Malta and Croatia. Along the way the crew engaged in a series of sporting events with local teams; they lost every match.

From the wooden wall to ice-cream frigate in two centuries. Ye gods, if the shades of Cochrane, Fisher and Churchill aren't howling and clanking through the corridors of Westminster and affording Mr. Blair et al not a moment's peace, then they are seriously wasting their afterlife.

I remember during the Falklands War that I remarked that the conflict in the South Atlantic marked a crisis in British history. This was a moment when afterwards Great Britain would have the choice of either becoming once again a world-class power or joining her Continental brethren in slinking off to historical obscurity.

It looks as though Horatio Hornblower has been forsaken for Mr. Bean.

Pure Gall

After Iran committed piracy and God knows how many violations of the Geneva conventions (up to and including mock executions) against a Royal Navy patrol operating under a UN mandate in Iraqi waters, Tehran's ambassador to London, Rasoul Movahedian had the bare-faced nerve to demand a reward for his country's perfidy:

We played our part and we showed our good will... now it is up to the British government to proceed in a positive way.

I don't know how much oil Iran has, but one thing it will never run short of is brass.

Home Safe

The fifteen Royal Navy sailors and marines kidnapped by Iran have arrived safe and are being debriefed at Royal Marines Barracks Chivenor, Devon.

Welcome home, lads.

Britons To Be Freed

Iran claims that it is releasing the fifteen Royal Navy sailors and marines that it kidnapped.

I'm holding off any celebrations until the men and woman are home safe-- and we find out exactly why they were let go.

The Kowtow

Britain and France had to choose between war and dishonour. They chose dishonour. They will have war.

Winston Churchill on the Munich Agreement, 1938

John Derbyshire looks at the easily-wrought "confessions" of the kidnapped Royal Navy sailors and marines and compares them to Private John Moyse.

Who? Unless you're up on your history of the Anglo-French expedition to Peking in 1860 you may need this reminder:

How on earth can Britons behave like that? A previous generation would not have done so. I knew the women of my mother’s generation pretty well (Mum was born in 1912), and I am certain that any one of them, given that headscarf and told to put it on, would have said: “You can hang me with it if you like, but I’ll be damned if I’ll wear the filthy thing.” The men likewise. What on earth has happened to the British? Where is John Moyse?

Well, he is of course on Wikipedia. Who isn’t? To spare you the trouble of reading all through, Moyse was a British soldier of the East Kent Regiment, nick-named “The Buffs” on account of their 17th-century uniforms, which prominently featured that color. Moyse was captured by the Chinese during the Second Opium War of the late 1850s. Taken before a Mandarin, he was ordered to kowtow, but refused. He was thereupon clubbed to death and decapitated, and his body thrown on a dung-heap. Sir Francis Doyle wrote a poem to celebrate Moyse’s defiance of the enemy. You can read the poem here.

Sir Harry Flashman had his own take on it based on his "eye witness" account:

That was how it happened-- The stories that he laughed in defiance, or made a speech about not bowing his head to any heathen, or recited a prayer, or even that he died drunk-- they're false. I'd say he was taken flat aback at the mere notion of kow-towing, and when it sank in, he wasn't having it, not if it cost him his life. You may ask, was he a hero or just a fool, and I'll not answer-- For I know this much, that each man has his price, and his was higher than yours or mine. That's all. I know one other thing-- whenever I hear someone say Proud as Lucifer, I think, no, proud as Private Moyes.

Derbyshire is a bit harsh on the captives; they are, after all, operating under standing orders and it's a bit much to judge another man in a tight situation when you aren't in his shoes, but the fact that a group of modern Britons acquiesced so quickly to the Iranian equivalent of the kowtow when their grandparents would have said "f*** you" and damn the consequences is painfully telling-- not so much on the seamen, but on a time where such humiliation is accepted by Britons and their government without so much as a shrug. However, such indifference in the face of tyranny cannot go for long without a heavy price.

Today, the white feather carries no stigma; no able-bodied man squirms with shame at the knowledge that he stays safe at home while a woman goes to war and risks captivity, death or worse in his place; and the words Ἢ τὰν ἢ ἐπὶ τᾶς are meaningless in more than their Greek, but that will have to change in the years to come unless we want to end up paraphrasing Churchill to our cost.

1979 Redux

Iranian "students" attacked the British embassy in Tehran. What could possibly go wrong with that?

Like it or not, Mr. Blair, you may have a real honest-to-God war on your hands.

Update: It looks as though Mr. Blair is about to go into full Jimmy Carter mode. From the Sunday Telegraph:

The Sunday Telegraph has learnt of plans to send a Royal Navy captain or commodore to Tehran, as a special envoy of the Government, to deliver a public assurance that officials hope will end the diplomatic standoff.

The move, which was discussed at a meeting of Whitehall's Cobra crisis committee yesterday, came as Downing Street officials explicitly cautioned against hopes of a speedy outcome and said that families of the hostages should prepare for the "long haul".

The Prime Minister, Tony Blair, and the Foreign Secretary, Margaret Beckett, have been warned that the impasse may develop into a long-term stand-off. Privately, officials are speculating that the crisis could continue for months.

Good old gambler's logic: It didn't work the last time, so it's bound to this time.

Update: The Captain's Quarters on how EU membership has prevented Britain from even imposing trade sanctions on the Mullahs.

Pleae, Sir, May I Have Another?

Mark Steyn on the Iranian crisis"

So we live today in a world of one-way sovereignty: American, British and Iraqi forces in Iraq respect the Syrian and Iranian borders; the Syrians and Iranians do not respect the Iraqi border. Patrolling the Shatt al-Arab at a time of war, the Royal Navy operates under rules of engagement designed by distant fainthearts with an eye to the polite fictions of "international law": If you're in a ''warship,'' you can't wage war. If you're in a ''destroyer,'' don't destroy anything. If you're in a "frigate," you're frigging done for.

On Sept. 11, a New York skyscraper was brought down by the Egyptian leader of a German cell of an Afghan terror group led by a Saudi. Islamism is only the first of many globalized ideological viruses that will seep undetected across national frontiers in the years ahead. Meanwhile, we put our faith in meetings of foreign ministers.

"It is better to be making the news than taking it," wrote Winston Churchill in 1898. But his successors have gotten used to taking it, and the men who make the news well understand that.

As the kids say, read the whole thing

Raving Mad

Comment by Health Secretary Patricia Hewitt:

It was deplorable that the woman hostage should be shown smoking. This sends completely the wrong message to our young people.

It isn't often that one sees priorities being so insanely skewed.

Tale of Two Maggies

I think everyone regrets that this position has arisen. What we want is a way out of it - we want it peacefully and we want it as soon as possible.

Foreign Secretary Margaret Beckett on Britain's response to Iran's kidnapping of fifteen Royal Navy sailors and marines.

Our diplomacy is backed by strength, and we have the resolve to use that strength if necessary.

Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher on Britain's response to Argentina's 1982 invasion of the Falkland Islands.

Guess which one will be the Jimmy Carter of the 21st century.

Turtle Bay Farce

The UN has issued a statement of "grave concern" over Iran's kidnapping of 15 Royal Navy sailors and marines. The British government is disappointed because it wanted the UN to "deplore" the kidnapping.

The only thing to deplore here is the gaping hole where Britain's spine used to be. It would be laughable if it weren't so tragic.

Quote of the Day

(C)learly very much like a cock-up and not a conspiracy.

Margaret Beckett on the kidnapping of fifteen Royal Navy sailors and marines.

Someone please take the post of Foreign Secretary away from this insane woman.

Quote of the Day

We are not seeking to put Iran in a corner. We are simply saying, 'please release the personnel who should not have been seized in the first place'.

Prime Minister Tony Blair's spokesman on Britain's response to Iran's kidnapping fifteen Royal Navy sailors and marines.

That sound you hear is the Mullahs laughing their guts out.

Geneva Conventions? What Geneva Conventions

The argument keeps being put forward that we should scrupulously follow the Geneva Conventions so that our enemies will be compelled to do likewise. Question is, when is this reciprocity supposed to kick in, if ever? So far the Iranians have committed the following violations of the Conventions:

• Threats to try the kidnapped fifteen Royal Navy sailors and Marines for espionage.
• Interrogating them.
• Parading them before cameras
  

I won't even go into how the Iranians have exploited Leading Seaman Faye Turney by making her wear a hijab, having her write "personal" letters to her family, making her "confess" on camera to invading Iranian territory, and dangling promises of her release. Some bloggers have been rather unkind to her about her co-operation with the Iranians, but this seems unfair, as in this situation she operates under the standing orders given to her and she must be judged accordingly. The true responsibility lies with the lunatics who knowingly put a woman (and a mother!) into harm's way for the sake of some wretched political orthodoxy that would have made Cromwell blanch.

Meanwhile, the British government is responding by cutting off bilateral relations with Tehran.

The Mullahs must be quaking in their sandals by now.

Hit 'Em With Your Handbag, Tony

Taking a cue from how well the nuclear negotiations have gone, the Blairites have said that they are trying to free the fifteen British sailors and marines kidnapped by Iran by engaging the Iranians in "discreet talks." If these do not work, then the British government will be "more explicit," but have made it clear that they "expect the immediate release of our personnel."

"Immediate" in this case being defined as some indeterminate point sometime in the future after which a stern letter will be sent followed by months of crawling to the United Nations for a raft of sanctions that will be as weak as a month-old teabag.

If this had happened in the days of Thatcher, the RAF would be fully briefed on targets and a Royal Navy task force would be passing Gibraltar by now. Come back, Maggie. All is forgiven.

A Step Closer

A new development in the Britain/Iran crisis from the Times:

A website run by associates of Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, the Iranian president, reported last night that the Britons would be put before a court and indicted.

Referring to them as “insurgents”, the site concluded: “If it is proven that they deliberately entered Iranian territory, they will be charged with espionage. If that is proven, they can expect a very serious penalty since according to Iranian law, espionage is one of the most serious offences.”

As the Captain's Quarter's points out, if this is true, it's a clear violation of the Geneva conventions. You cannot charge a man with espionage when he is operating in uniform.

Memo to White Hall: This is no time to be playing "Softly, softly catchee monkey." Start getting in touch with your inner Thatcher.

Update: The Belmont Club predicts that the "human rights" crowd is going to be strangely quiet about this episode because,

As currently interpreted the Geneva Conventions only apply to individuals bent on destroying America. Individuals who blow up elementary schools, kidnap children, attack churches and mosques, kill invalids in wheelchairs, plan attacks on skyscrapers in New York, behead journalists, detonate car bombs with children to camouflage their crime, or board jetliners with explosive shoes -- all while wearing mufti or even women's clothing -- these are all considered "freedom fighters" of the most principled kind. They and they alone enjoy the protections of the Geneva Convention. As to Americans like Tucker and Menchaca or Israeli Gilad Shalit -- or these fifteen British sailors for that matter, it is a case of "what Geneva Convention?" We don't need no steenkin' Geneva Convention to try these guys as spies. That's the way the Human Rights racket works.

On The Knife Edge

Iran has seized two Royal Navy patrol boats with fifteen sailors and marines on board, claiming that the craft were in Iranian waters. Meanwhile, Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has suddenly cancelled his trip to New York, citing "America's obstruction in issuing visas," though one suspects a more immediate reason.

Clearly, Iran is trying to provoke the West into either reacting or backing down and now the ball is in White Hall's court. If Britain does not take this act of war for what it is and act accordingly, then we might as well trade in the white duster for a white flag.

Personally, I'm hoping for a quiet meeting with the Iranian ambassador that includes the words "regime", "change" and "Trident".

Poo Peril

From Portsmouth Today News:

Seven sailors from the Royal Navy aircraft carrier HMS Illustrious were airlifted to hospital after being overcome by fumes.

The sailors, all male, suffered eye and throat irritation after being affected by poisonous gas in a junior ratings' toilet area.

What the Hell were they eating?!?

Britannia Keeps her Trident

In a burst of sanity, the House of Commons voted to replace the Trident nuclear deterrent when it reaches its service limit in 2020.

The press has made a meal of the backbench rebellion against the government and fostered the impression that if the vote passed, it would barely squeak through, which it did-- if a landslide victory of 409 to 161 can be called a "squeak".

Whither Trident?

The question of whether Britain will replace the Trident nuclear deterrent has been complicated the question of whether Britain can replace it.

The Royal (Belgian) Navy

The First Sea Lord, Sir Jonathon Band has said that if the scheduled budget cuts go through, he will resign rather than see the Royal Navy reduced to the size of Belgium's.

If Britain's defence budget were even a modest fraction of her GDP and if the government ceased to use its procurement programmes to cook the treasury's books and curry favour with the EU, the Royal Navy would have a hundred first-class fighting ships, a state-of-the-art satellite network, and four strike carrier groups (that's groups, not carriers) at its disposal.

Instead, we're using Nelson's sarcophagus as a piss pot.

Mothball or Anchor?

Is the cutting of the Royal Navy by half an example of penny-pinching short sightedness or a shotgun wedding intended to severe Britain's ties with America in favour of a decaying Europe?

Only Tony Blair would prefer to step out of a supercarrier and into a worm-eaten dinghy.

Insult to Injury

Not only is the government threatening to cut the Royal Navy by half, now they're considering thanking the men for all their hard work and dedication by freezing all promotions until 2012.

The words "stab" and "back" leap to mind